From Pain to Purpose: My Journey of Endurance and Renewal Through Misogi
And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, in fact, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what the storm is all about.
Haruki Murakami
In Japanese culture, there is a beautiful and meaningful practice called misogi - an ancient Shinto ritual that embodies the essence of renewal and purification. It is a powerful act of cleansing the mind, body, and spirit, helping us shed negativity and impurities to embrace a fresh start and a deeper connection with ourselves and the universe.
In today’s world, the true essence of misogi has expanded beyond ancient traditions to become a powerful journey of self-discovery. It involves taking on a bold, challenging task each year - something uncomfortable and uncertain, with about a 50% chance of success. This practice ignites our desire to push beyond our perceived limits, inspiring us to confront our fears, doubts, and weaknesses. Through this courageous pursuit, we shed old habits and beliefs, revealing a stronger, more resilient version of ourselves. Embracing misogi is not just about overcoming challenges - it’s about transforming ourselves from within, unlocking a deep sense of confidence, purpose, and personal growth.
My Misogi Journey: The 29029 Challenge
In 2022 and 2023, I embarked on my own deeply personal misogi that pushed my limits. I participated in 29029, a grueling hiking endurance event where I strived to climb the equivalent elevation of Mt. Everest (29,029 feet) in just 36 hours. At the start, I had never attempted anything like this before. I was not naturally inclined towards endurance challenges, and stepping outside my comfort zone was never my favorite thing. But at that moment in my life, I realized that I needed change. I needed to break free from the self-imposed shackles that had held me back for so long. This experience became a turning point - proof that with courage and determination, we can overcome our fears, redefine our limits, and discover resilience we never knew we had.
Snowbasin: Learning From Setbacks
My first experience with 29029 at Snowbasin in Utah was a powerful lesson in perseverance. I had to hike up the mountain 13 times to reach the height of Everest. I managed seven ascents before my body and mind told me I couldn’t go any further. I felt defeated and questioned myself, thinking, “What was I thinking?” and “I’ll never do that again.” But just 24 hours later, my perspective shifted. I realized this challenge was about growth, resilience, and learning. I understood that I needed to focus on my nutrition, hydration, and most importantly, strengthen my mental mindset. This experience taught me that setbacks are just setups for a greater comeback. I was determined to try again next year, stronger and more prepared, embracing the journey with an open heart and unwavering spirit.
Whistler: Rising Through the Pain
I dedicated myself wholeheartedly over the next year, and when the next event at Whistler in Canada arrived, I was prepared. I knew I had to push myself to hike up the mountain 8 times, and I was mentally ready to face the challenge. Physically, I believed I was, but around my third ascent, I started to feel pain in my sciatic nerve. By the time I completed my fifth ascent, I couldn’t walk anymore. The pain was the most intense I had ever experienced. In that moment, I made the heartbreaking decision to stop. Despite not reaching my dream of Everest, I was proud of the progress I had made - improving year after year and conquering the equivalent of Mt. Kilimanjaro. If not for the pain, I would have been on track to reach Everest. This journey taught me that perseverance, resilience, and trusting in my own strength can lead to incredible growth, even in the face of setbacks.
After my experience in Whistler, I took some time to reflect deeply on what I had learned and felt within my heart that I was destined to try again. The dream of returning to the mountain in 2024 was a fire that never extinguished within me. However, life had other plans.
Setbacks - and a New Misogi
That spring, I faced a challenging setback when I broke my foot. The healing process interrupted my training and tested my resolve. Knowing this was my third attempt, I was committed to being in the best possible mental and physical state. The injury set me back, but it didn’t break my spirit. I made the difficult decision to withdraw from the event, yet my desire to push forward and pursue my dream never faded.
The following year, when registration for 2025 arrived, I was in the midst of a profound life change—contemplating a move to Salt Lake City. Simultaneously, my 86-year-old father decided to relocate to Seattle to be closer to my brother and his family. Reflecting on these significant shifts, I realized I needed to pause my registration for another year. Packing and sorting through two houses would require my full attention, and I chose to prioritize that. Moving out of the home where I had lived for over 20 years and building a new life in a different city became my misogi.
Seeking Healing and Understanding
Over these past few weeks, as I stand on the brink of registration for 2026, I find myself facing a heartfelt decision about whether to participate. Reflecting on my journey, I remember the intense sciatic pain I experienced at Whistler in 2023 - something I had never encountered before. My desire to understand its root cause stemmed from a deep need to grow and prevent future struggles.
Initially, I sought answers from various professionals. A chiropractor in Atlanta suggested that the type of car I rented at Whistler was the culprit, claiming I was perfectly aligned before the event - yet I remained unconvinced. An orthopedist then told me the issue was muscular, directing me to a physical therapist. Despite numerous sessions with overwhelmed and overscheduled therapists, I still felt lost, searching for the truth behind my pain.
Moving to Salt Lake City brought new hope and a renewed call to 29029. Frustrated but determined, I began searching for doctors who would see me as a whole person - someone committed to healing, listening, and understanding.
That’s when I discovered a local chiropractor and regenerative medicine specialist. From my first visit, I felt genuinely heard. He took the time to review my X-rays and was able to identify the root cause of my sciatic issues - a bulging disc between L4 and L5 that was pinching the nerve root, impacting my sciatic nerve, and causing extreme pain. Additionally, years of bad posture and a desk job had caused a misalignment of my hips. My doctor outlined the plan of attack, which would include chiropractic adjustments, spinal decompression therapy, and ozone therapy.
Five months ago, I faced a challenging journey with my physical wellness, but today I am filled with hope and gratitude. I’ve gained 2 mm of space in the area of my bulging disc, and my hips have also improved their balance by 2 mm. While there is still progress to be made, each small step is a victory. I am excited to be approved to begin strength training to continue building my strength and improve my physical wellness.
Loss, Faith, and Moving Forward
I’m at a pivotal moment in my journey, facing a deeply personal decision: to register for 2026’s event or not. This choice is far from easy, as it weighs heavily on my heart. We’ve discussed the physical challenges I’ve faced in preparing for this event and the steps I’ve taken to overcome them. But beyond the physical, there’s an emotional aspect that is just as significant.
Earlier this year, I experienced a profound loss - someone very close to me, my biggest cheerleader and unwavering supporter during both of my 29029 adventures. This person was always there, waiting for me at the top of the mountain in the quiet of the night, ready to celebrate my triumphs or lend a helping hand if I struggled. Their encouraging texts during each climb fueled my perseverance.
Not having them with me in this upcoming potential attempt is incredibly heartbreaking and emotionally challenging. Yet, in these difficult times, I’ve learned to lean into my faith and find strength in my relationship with God. I remind myself that moving forward isn’t just about the challenge - it’s about honoring the place they had in my life and continuing to grow stronger every day.
Carrying Lessons Forward
As I stand at this crossroads, uncertain yet hopeful, I carry with me the lessons of every ascent and setback, the memories of those who have cheered me on, and the unwavering belief that growth is found both on the mountain and within the heart. Whether or not I step onto the 29029 course again, I know my journey of misogi continues through every act of courage, resilience, and faith I choose each day. In honoring my own path - and those who have walked beside me - I move forward stronger, grateful, and ready to embrace whatever challenge and transformation the future holds.
Mountain Mindset
If my journey resonated with you, I encourage you to look within and ask yourself: What challenge-big or small-could become your own misogi? Let this be the moment you commit to stepping beyond your comfort zone, to pursue something that both excites and scares you. Your path to renewal, resilience, and personal growth is waiting. Trust yourself, embrace the uncertainty, and remember - you don’t have to climb a mountain to discover your strength. Wherever you are, start today. Take that first step toward your own transformation, and know that you, too, have the courage and power to create a story worth telling.
